I am lucky

I've been thinking a lot today about how lucky I am.

I'm a stay at home mum - on benefits.  My husband is studying to be a nurse, on Austudy.  We have 5 children.  We don't have a great deal of money, yet thanks to this generous country we live in, we have enough money for a roof over our heads, warm beds to sleep in, clothes on our backs and more than enough food in our cupboards.

True, we don't have money for extras that other people might have as a necessity in their life - but we have enough for our basic needs.  We have enough to pay our bills that come in (maybe not by the time they are due but extensions aren't anything to be ashamed of asking for!).

My children are all fit and healthy.  They have no major health issues.  Coo has an extra tooth in her mouth (the deformity of which comes from me apparently) and the new baby (who will now be known as "Lucky") has a pretty big port wine birth mark on his belly but that is all.  We do wonder if Speedy is deaf or if she is just being a typical 4 year old so time will tell on that one.

My children are happy if I serve up sausages in bread or pasta and cheese for dinner.  In fact, that is their favourite meal so nights that I'm exhausted and don't feel like cooking - they are happy to eat that.

I have never lost a child or anyone extremely close to me.  Out of 5 pregnancies, I have had 5 children.  I think the odds on that happening are pretty rare, considering the miscarriage rate is around 1 in 3 pregnancies (from memory?)  My pregnancies were all pretty good, and I had no morning sickness (that in itself is pretty damn lucky!)

My last birth probably should have killed me.  And little baby Lucky.  Two pretty rare complications and losing a bucketload of blood and I'm still here.  Since that birth I have been questioning why.  Why didn't I die?  Why didn't Lucky die?  I'm nothing special, I don't have anything to really offer the world - I'm not wise, I'm not beautiful, I'm not talented in any way.  Why did the universe decide not to take me from my family?  Because I'm incredibly lucky.

I have a husband who respects me.  Who rubs my feet and my butt every night, even when I'm asleep!  (Which sounds kind of creepy but I have sciatic issues, and if I don't get it rubbed every night I find it hard to walk the next day)  He does nice things for my friends when I tell ask him to, and he never questions it or says that he doesn't feel like it. He is a good dad - even though he probably doesn't think so. He downloads crappy mindless reality tv shows that I like watching - and watches them with me.

I have no major health issues.  I have no mental health issues that make me unable to live my life.  I have no disabilities to stop me from getting up and doing what I want to do.

My family is awesome.  Willing to help, always have my back and are hysterically funny.  I have good friends (not a heap, but enough for me!)

It is so easy to focus on the negative (we never have enough money for what we would like to have, we drive a 9 year old car that we will drive till its dead, our children are loud and our home life is chaos most of the time, etc etc) however looking past all those things - I am lucky.

And I am thankful.