Saturday, 5 November 2011

The benefits of a Village

Back when my mum was raising us, she didn't have a lot of help around her.  My family moved around a lot so they didn't have family around to help out, she never used child care of anything like that - and she didn't really have a lot of friends.  Of course she had bigger age gaps than I do (my brother is 7 years older than me, my sister is 4.5 years older than me), but still, she did it all on her own.  She didn't appear to need a Village to help her raise her children.

I'm proud to say that I have a Village helping me.  It doesn't make me a weaker mum, it makes me a stronger, more capable mum.  From my friends who let me vent about my frustrating days, or just make me a cuppa and pick up one of my crying kids - it all helps.  It all makes a difference in my life.  Or my aunty and uncle who live around the corner, I swear, they are just like another set of parents.  I see my uncle more than I see my dad thats for sure.  They are awesome with my kids as well, and are always there to give me a break from them - my aunty is all too willing to take all 4 of them away for 2 hours to give me a break, and I do cherish those times!  Just the ability to have a cup of coffee in peace.  Or go to the loo in peace.  Or watch what I want to on the tv.  Its incredible how you appreciate the little things after you have 4 noisy things running around all day.

I also use a child care for Sparrow and Coo for Wednesdays and Fridays.  I know a lot of mothers out there think its pretty bad to use child care when you don't work, but I love the fact that my kids are getting exposure to stuff that I wouldn't know how to do - I'm not a child care worker, I have no experience in early childhood, and the stuff they come home with - I just wouldn't have thought of it.  So I definitely count that as part of my Village.

After my last post I spent 2 hours on the phone to my sister.  I vented and raged and it felt great just to hear someone say "I know exactly what you mean, mine are the same".  Its hard being a stay at home mum, sometimes you feel so isolated and like your kids are the only ones that act like this.  Its nice to have reassurance that other kids are like yours, and most of the things they are going through are just classic phases of childhood.  And more importantly - you're not alone suffering through it.

I really don't know how my mum did it alone - because I would be so lost without my Village.  I just hope I can create a similar Village in Queensland.


  1. You will most definately have a similar village up here my sweets xoxo

  2. Ahhh isolated is so much how I've been feeling lately. No "outside" work for 5 years now... and I've gotten to the point of feeling, what is my purpose anymore, what have I got to contribute to anything. You have a village up here too... you know you do :)